Waking Up

When Covid hit, I was no longer able to work 18-hour days, 7 days a week. I couldn’t escape anymore, so I was forced to slow down and well, take a hard look at my life. I realized it wasn’t just my mental and physical health that was suffering, but my most important relationships were taking a beating, too. My kids were like strangers, emotionally miles away, and my marriage barely existed. Michael and I were more roommates than husband and wife—two ghosts under the same roof.

I was so pissed, realizing I had lost so much over the years. Years I could never get back. I remember screaming inside, “This can’t be my life!”

Hitting Rock Bottom

The critical moment came one day when I was cleaning the house and stumbled on some old journals of mine. Journals that spanned the past 25 years of my life.

As I sat on the edge of my bed flipping through them, and—damn—I was floored. Leafing through journal after journal that spanned over a couple of decades, I realized all the dreams, wishes, and goals I had for my life, I was still wishing for—25 years later! I had never achieved those dreams that were deep in my soul.

I cried as I thought to myself, “If I were dead and my kids found my journals, what would they think of me?” Would they see their mother as a failure? A total embarrassment? A woman who had dreams and never pursued them? Someone who complained, but didn’t change a damn thing? A woman who gave up?

Would they end up resenting me? Would they shake their heads in pity and disgust when they remembered me?

Would I be an example of how NOT to live their lives?

Or worse, would they live their lives as unfulfilled as I was? Like me, would they live an unlived life?

As morbid as my thinking was, it was in that moment that I knew I had to make some serious changes. I decided—right then and there— this was not how I was going to be remembered. This was not going to be the example I’d leave behind. “No”, I said to myself, “This shit’s gotta change. Now!”

Taking Back Control

So I made the difficult decision to close my school down permanently. And while leaving my students was hard (as I loved them so) I knew deep down it was the right decision. For me, and for what truly mattered most—my health, my life, my family. It was time to cut the cord.

I took time to reflect on what I wanted—and didn’t want—in life.

I invested in myself—getting the help I needed to heal from the traumas and beliefs that had been holding me back.

I started taking care of myself—exercising, eating real food, and actually sleeping for once.

I started to lose weight—pounds and baggage—I was getting back in shape.

I started patching up my relationships—stitching those threads back together.

I climbed out of that debt hole—one shovel at a time.

I learned to set boundaries around my work and life—no more bleeding into each other.

I laced up my dancing shoes again—kicked the dust off and moved.

I grabbed my dreams by the horns—set goals and made a plan to hit them.

I wanted to light a fire for my family and build a legacy they’d carry. I wanted to rebuild my marriage, take the wheel of my life, and stop wasting one more second wishing for what I’d always dreamed.

Why Working with Me is Different